Summer is a great time to meet new men. People are clicking off their remotes and getting out again. Here are 12 tips for meeting a guy who makes you happy you clicked off yours:
1. Write a list of the qualities you don't want in a man (for good material, think about your old boyfriends).
2. Turn it around and write the qualities you do want.
3. Read this list three times a day. Visualize yourself with such a person. Bring up the emotions you'd feel being with such a person.
4. Go where men go. Become a regular face there (this is key). Sign up for sailing lessons or fishing trips. Show up at readings at your local bookstore. Spend Sunday afternoons enjoying a cocktail at an outdoor restaurant. Find something you like to do and do it. I repeat: Become a regular. Become a friend.
5. Dress appropriately. For instance, wear sportswear, not low-cut dresses, to sports bars. You'd be shocked how many smart women try to get attention by looking overly sexy, but they strike others as being 'on the make.' As a result, they attract guys on the make. Look pretty, but blend in with the crowd.
6. Avoid singles-only events. They draw creeps like ants to a picnic.
7. Accept invitations to family barbecues, christenings, and weddings. You never know when someone will bring along a new face. Do not allow yourself to be held hostage by smug married people who imply you're defective because you're single, or who yammer endlessly about their children's achievements.
8. Avoid spending a lot of time sunning yourself on the beach when you could be out meeting new people of both sexes (new women friends are often a great source for meeting new men friends).
9. Get out of your car. Take mass transit. Walk once in a while. Wait on line for a bank teller instead of whizzing into the drive-thru.
10.Smile at people. Most humans (the ones worth getting to know, anyway) will smile back. Note: This tip doesn't always work in large urban areas like London or New York City, where you could be mistaken for a crazy person. It does work almost everywhere else.
11. Learn how to flirt. This does not mean batting your eyes and acting like a big dummy. Women who are successful with men are not necessarily beautiful, but they do know how to talk to them.
12. This last tip will elicit serious groans if you happen to have a PhD in electrophysiology, but I'm going for it anyway. If you like people and want to make extra money this summer, take a job as a waitress in a restaurant where successful people go. Melanie met her successful husband during her stint as a waitress. Ten years later, they have two children and two beautiful homes. They're also wild about each other. The musician Phil Lesh didn't end up with one of the thousands of fans he cultivated in his years with the Grateful Dead. He married the waitress who used to serve him breakfast at the coffee shop near his home (lest you fret that his wife still serves him, his autobiography mentions that Phil washes dishes and used to drive his children to school). He and his wife have been married 20 years.
The world is full of wonderful men, so turn off the TV and back away from your computer. Determine the qualities you want in your wonderful man. Then put yourself in places where you're likely to meet him.
Terry Hernon MacDonald is the happily married author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Sign up for free dating tips at http://www.marrysmart.com . For Dating Advice (Almost) Daily, go to http://happygirlmusing.blogspot.com
1. Write a list of the qualities you don't want in a man (for good material, think about your old boyfriends).
2. Turn it around and write the qualities you do want.
3. Read this list three times a day. Visualize yourself with such a person. Bring up the emotions you'd feel being with such a person.
4. Go where men go. Become a regular face there (this is key). Sign up for sailing lessons or fishing trips. Show up at readings at your local bookstore. Spend Sunday afternoons enjoying a cocktail at an outdoor restaurant. Find something you like to do and do it. I repeat: Become a regular. Become a friend.
5. Dress appropriately. For instance, wear sportswear, not low-cut dresses, to sports bars. You'd be shocked how many smart women try to get attention by looking overly sexy, but they strike others as being 'on the make.' As a result, they attract guys on the make. Look pretty, but blend in with the crowd.
6. Avoid singles-only events. They draw creeps like ants to a picnic.
7. Accept invitations to family barbecues, christenings, and weddings. You never know when someone will bring along a new face. Do not allow yourself to be held hostage by smug married people who imply you're defective because you're single, or who yammer endlessly about their children's achievements.
8. Avoid spending a lot of time sunning yourself on the beach when you could be out meeting new people of both sexes (new women friends are often a great source for meeting new men friends).
9. Get out of your car. Take mass transit. Walk once in a while. Wait on line for a bank teller instead of whizzing into the drive-thru.
10.Smile at people. Most humans (the ones worth getting to know, anyway) will smile back. Note: This tip doesn't always work in large urban areas like London or New York City, where you could be mistaken for a crazy person. It does work almost everywhere else.
11. Learn how to flirt. This does not mean batting your eyes and acting like a big dummy. Women who are successful with men are not necessarily beautiful, but they do know how to talk to them.
12. This last tip will elicit serious groans if you happen to have a PhD in electrophysiology, but I'm going for it anyway. If you like people and want to make extra money this summer, take a job as a waitress in a restaurant where successful people go. Melanie met her successful husband during her stint as a waitress. Ten years later, they have two children and two beautiful homes. They're also wild about each other. The musician Phil Lesh didn't end up with one of the thousands of fans he cultivated in his years with the Grateful Dead. He married the waitress who used to serve him breakfast at the coffee shop near his home (lest you fret that his wife still serves him, his autobiography mentions that Phil washes dishes and used to drive his children to school). He and his wife have been married 20 years.
The world is full of wonderful men, so turn off the TV and back away from your computer. Determine the qualities you want in your wonderful man. Then put yourself in places where you're likely to meet him.
Terry Hernon MacDonald is the happily married author of "How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams." Sign up for free dating tips at http://www.marrysmart.com . For Dating Advice (Almost) Daily, go to http://happygirlmusing.blogspot.com
0 comments:
Post a Comment